I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
