What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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