she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
