I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Dignity is for republicans.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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