Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I'm passing your future prison.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Randomize