What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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