At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Randomize
