it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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