I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
We're like a lot better than the average bears
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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