I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
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