maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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