All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
