that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
