May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
