It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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