Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Randomize
