We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
