I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
