she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Also, beer. Big fan.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
