just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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