Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
i need an iv and a liver transplant
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
