you guys were way drunker than both of me
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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