Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
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