I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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