I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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