I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
