He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
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