dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
