he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Randomize
