no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
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