I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize
