I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize
