Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize