just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Randomize
