In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
Randomize
