Are we in a gay sports bar?
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize