Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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