Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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