I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
I love having hate sex.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize