He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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