There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Randomize
