I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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