well you can't waste a boner
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize