Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize