My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
