id be glad to
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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