He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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