so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
