oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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