You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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